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i-am-carrie sayeth unto me: Your Score: House Tully36% Dominant, 72% Extroverted, 54% Trustworthy
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1.What time is it? 8:47 pm Personal 2.Do you want to answer these? Some of them. I won't answer all of them. 3.Name? Elisa 43. Do you want to answer these? Not really. Relationships 58. Do you want to answer these? I might quit in the middle. In the Past 24 Hours Have You? 70. Do you wonder why I'm asking these questions? You wrote this, probably so that you could answer them yourself, or maybe even get the answers to the questions by the people you are friends with. You did not foresee my answering of this survey, nor will you ever read my answers. I'm guessing you are a child of sorts, maybe a teenager. How wonderful for you. What's great about being an ignorant little person is that you get to have fun being all of the things we older people look down on, but it's okay for you, because you do not know it. I myself once walked to another town with a friend pretending to be homeless. We brought our blankets and took naps along the way. I said hello to a cute guy and he said hi back. It was very educational. You get to do weird stuff like that when you're young and you don't even have to know how ridiculous you're being. I'll continue this survey for 3 more minutes, and then I have to poop. Have-you-ever ? 82. You want me to tell you? What? 83.Smoked? yes Favorites 138. Why do you want to know? What? Sorry, Carrie. I didn't read all you wrote. I should have just read and not answered any. It's time to poop and shower. I wonder if I'm going to feel like watching that movie I got from the library when I'm done with all that... many questions skipped 500. What time is it? 9:58 Fuck this. This is way too long (Elisa agrees with Carrie). |
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Okay, so it turns out that Dennis Kucinich and I don't disagree on any issues that are important to me. Ron Paul's not so bad either, except that he wants to better control illegal immigration. I think it's bad enough that the illegal's don't get what the rest of us get (there are American citizens born to illegal immigrants, who starve right along with their older brothers and sisters, just because their mother's have been turned down for a green card). I would not vote for anyone who is for the death penalty. Am I allowed to say that on here? Last time I couldn't. Last time they blurped it out. Anyway, if they blurped it again, it's about people receiving the most severe punishment for taking another's life. |
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I'd say I'd definitely vote for #1 if he makes the presidential elections, but I care about some issues more than others. I think I'll have to go back and decode all of the nny's. Of course, I tend to just vote Democrat. Put the bat down, Paul. This year I'll do some research first. 1.Dennis Kucinich |
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I'm in the brainstorming stage of designing a new curriculum for schools. Everybody who's been through school probably realizes its general shortcomings: children are bored, stressed, scared, unmotivated, and learning things that do not interest them and that they will never use (they know this and when they mention it to their teachers their teachers give them an example of when they might use it, but, aha! those very kids who knew they wouldn't use it are so bored with it that they do not properly learn it, can't eventually remember it, and don't go on to use it. Ever.) There are loads of other things that children hate about schools, and some of that includes being humiliated and just mistreated in general. The new curriculum I'm inventing will be one which is based upon what the children should be preparing for (depending on their age, it could be college or the workforce or it could be making friends and learning take turns and share). I do not reject the conventional ideas that children need to learn the basics of literacy and mathematics. I do however reject the way children learn everything out of context. We teach our children that 4 X 8 is 32 without even explaining the implications of multiplication. If we did teach them what multiplication really means, it would not be so confusing for them (currently the children learn addition, subtraction, then multiplication, and devision without so much as an indication that they have seperate meanings and uses. For example: if I told you to color all red items with your yellow marker and all blue items with your green marker and then told you, "okay everybody, not get out your purple marker and color all red items purple and get out your brown marker and color all blue items brown" you'd wonder what the hell for. But I wouldn't tell you. All I'd tell you is: We're doing multiplication and division now! Put away your yellow and green markers! And then one day you'd be doing as you were told, when all of a sudden I'd expect you to color some red items purple, but some yellow. And the same thing with the blue. I'd want some brown, but some green. Of course, eventually, people do figure out what they're doing with their colors. But is it worth all of the confusion? Of course not. Children should be learning to understand the theory behind the math with practical applications and hands-on games and activities. Reading can be done in much the same way. And all the while, we should be teaching our youth to be decent, caring, compromising, innovative, and confident individuals. My plan is to figure out what each age/grade group is preparing for in life, which I've already done while your eyes were glazing over and you were spitting that chicken bone into your napkin. Next, I will figure out what the children preparing for each stage of life need to learn, what they're interested in, how their interests can help them learn what they need to learn, and some toher fun things that can be introduced in order to help them learn what they need to learn. Any and all suggestions will be carefully read and there was a fire drill. Just now. But we're back. And my kids are up. So comment with your comment. Ahora! |
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I hate social anxiety. I went to an open house at a Trenton charter school yesterday. I tried to avoid giving away too much; I didn't want anyone to know I'm me. I didn't want them to know I didn't have a cell phone, because everyone has one. But the thing was so short that I couldn't just wait for three hours for John to show up at the allotted time (it had been decided that I'd bring money for a payphone, but if there was none, then I'd wait until one). So I asked about a payphone to a very old looking board member. There was none, or at least the man didn't think there was. So I saw a lady outside using a cell phone. Aha! She had a cell phone. But you can't very well ask someone to use the phone that they're using at that very moment. A woman asked to use my pen. An eye for an eye, I think. Maybe I should ask her if she has a phone. But I didn't want to appear too needy. I didn't want her to feel like I was a drug user asking her for money on the street. So I didn't ask her to use her phone and I didn't even get my pen back. My favorite pen! It said Paterson Public Schools on it. So I was waiting around and another board member said he couldn't tell if I'm coming or going. So I told him I had to wait until 1 o'clock. Why? he asked. Because I don't have a phone, I said. Well he was dumbfounded and said that I should have just askes someone to use a phone. That I could use the school phone or his cell phone, whichever I like. So I used the school phone. The lady who'd written me an email imploring me to come to this open house showed me where it was and asked "so is that why...blah blah blah," I wasn't listening. "No," I said. Then I said something else, but I wasn't listening to myself, either. I called John, almost ready to cry. He told me he'd be there in 10 minutes. I walk out to wait, and the board member tried to engage me in conversation. I don't know if it was the anxiety or sleep deprivation, but I just felt all day that I'd think of something to say, start to say it or not, but change my mind in either case and just wish I didn't have to say anything at all, and then stare off into space. It's like, if I had been writing emails to these people standing before me, I would have just deleted everything and saved replying for another time when I felt like it. I wish I could do that in real life. I even forgot to say goodbye to that board member when the lady told me that a few people were going to get to talk to the Head of School in the library and I should go, too. When I looked back for him, I don't even remember if I saw him or not, I probably didn't, but I didn't say bye. And the board members do the hiring! He probably thinks of me as a little girl who lacks all social, um, things. See? That's how I talk when I'm in public. I can't remember a single word for what I want to say! I hate it. Okay, time to shower.
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The internet really sucks up my time. I didn't even have enough time to read that long repost Paul posted (reposted), though I tried, and I had no time whatever to read Gigi's post. I think I'll go on the internet every other night, this way I can find some time to paint or something. I haven't even pooped and showered yet and it's after 10! All I did on the internet tonight was reply to three emails on Cafemom.com, look at my myspace and realize that this lady I added per request has commented on my page three times in the last five days, reply to Paul's comment on lj, read Carrie's post and comments, and comment on most of her comments. All of this took more than an hour. I don't have hours like that. I can't just throw them away! At least I didn't have to clean anything. I think John cleaned everything. But I really wish I would get off my ass and set up my paints so that I can finally paint one night without having to set up first. I wonder if I should paint the background first, like with a wash of color, and not worry about the details in the background that are found in the original picture. After all, if background details aren't my bowl of rice pudding, then I might as well leave them out, thus creating a style that is truly me. Lazy-style. Alright!
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Yesterday the four-year-olds were having graduation practice. I finagled about 7 minutes for them to stay and clean up their mess (it was center time when the family worker asked for the kids to immediately get in line) and then they left. I was headed toward the bathroom, and subsequently went inside, while my co-worker, we'll call her Trish cause that's her name, was complaining about having to go outside with her class (they're three) and I suppose she was upset at having to do anything at all since she's quite lazy. My other co-worker, who also works with an older class, told Trish she had been demoted (she used to work in my class, and I worked with three-year-olds, before she took a six-month maternity leave and then the teacher I work with decided she didn't want Trish in her class anymore because Trish is lazy and never participates in anything, only that's not what we told her because that would have hurt her feelings. Instead we told her that I am now here so that I can learn from the teacher in this room [the other teacher I used to work with is also lazy]). So Trish said something to the effect of "she's there to learn. What's she learnin'? She ain't learnin' nothin'. Dumb as a six-dollar-bill and they don't even make those." Of course, I was shocked. I hadn't done anything to her. We're usually nice to eachother. She may have been joking, but what a rude joke! But then, last night, I got to thinking. Trish is the dumbest of the assistents (and of course it boils me that I've always been so polite about it, never being arrogant toward her and never even acting as if she should understand somthing that she didn't [especially in meetings when she needs everything explained and then she still doesn't get it for years]), and she's even dumber than the dumbest of the teachers (in my opinion, because dumbness is a subjective concept [and I'm not talking about the inability to speak] since there are different areas of intelligence), and she's dumber than the family workers and our boss and the floater, and so, sadly, Trish is the dumbest of the entire staff. And so I jokingly told John (husband), and Carrie that since she's the dumbest, anything she says must be wrong, and so I must be super smart!
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Paul and Harlock think it'd be a good idea for people to take a maturity test before having sex, or so I've heard. Since other people having sex is not something we can control, (for example, in the Upward Bound program I attended at Ramapo College when I was in high school, there was a rule: no sex. But then one of my group leaders, Alex [with whom I later had a fling, but see, it was after I'd finished with the program so it wasn't against the rules] had to go buy about 13 pregnancy tests while everyone was on a trip to see Armagedon [I didn't get to see it because Mommy had told me she might have to pick me up early on Friday, which I took to mean that she would have to pick me up early on Friday, so I waited behind,with this girl who used to ride with us, so we both missed the movie, but that's okay because I only wanted to go because I'd thought Alex was going]). So we can't control who gives birth to children (babies, rather). But why not mandate psychological testing for anyone applying for a social security card, anyone recieving prenatal care, anyone on a birth certificate as parents, etc. Why stop there? Anyone applying for foster children, adoption, or lets just try to get everyone tested who cannot prove that they are infertile/sterile? This not only would increase the need for psychologists, which I hope one day to be, but we can also mandate therapy for everyone who needs it, thus creating more jobs for psychologists, which isn't my intention, just an added bonus. My intention, good people, is to educate parents, who were once abused themselves, as to the repricussions (sp?) of beating and/or sexually abusing their children. Now, of course, we do have men (mostly men) that do not have kids that will still abuse children, but the reprecussions (sp?) are more dire when the acts are committed by ones own parents. My class just walked in. Let me see if I can get to my point quickly, if it hasn't already been gotten to. Even something as seemingly harmless as, I forget what my mother-in-law said to the baby, but even something seemingly harmless can have ill effects on one's confidence. OH! I remember. It was when he took a sip of his sippy cup, only to spit it back out to make the sippy cup sound. She was like, "that wasn't smart." And so I corrected her. She calls her own son "moron" and the like. Anyway, people can change with education. Maybe mandatory child psychology classes for those freshman year manditory classes that they make you take regardless of your major? What do you think?
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I want to get a muffin for Aidan's birthday breakfast tomorrow, but my co-worker isn't here today (someone needs to watch the children). I need to go to the bank, too, because the bakery is a cash only business. OOh, and I should try to get John to take me somewhere to get him a birthday present that I can give him on his birthday instead of waiting until the party. I could start some kind of birthday tradition. What oh what should it be?
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This morning I was hungry, and put some poptarts (yummy strawberry danish poptarts) into the toaster because I don't have a toaster at work. I forgot my poptarts and called the nanny as soon as I got to work, to tell her to put them aside for me. "I left poptarts in the toaster," I said. "I know. I'm eatin' 'em," she said. "Oh, well, there were, after all, on sale," I thought to myself. "That's okay. There's still two more packets," I said out-loud. Okay, I have to start working now. My co-worker isn't here today. There aren't many kids here today, either. 25 out of 60 so far in the whole school. Yey!
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What are you doing reading this? I said go! No no! Go get my gloves!
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I'm posting, Carrie. John's on the phone with his father. I told him to get up so I could sit here. So there he stands. Waiting for the day that he can once again sit at his computer. Jewel sings a tune. John's having a bad week. His dog had to be put to sleep today, which I don't believe in for the most part, but I'd rather Apollo not be in as much pain as he was. The only reason I really don't believe in it is because we don't put our old people to sleep, so why our old dogs? The old person is more in a position to decide if he/she would rather be dead and is more able to communicate their decision, once decided upon. The milk expires today. I used some for cereal this morning, and it was fine. Well, what am I supposed to write about then? Stop complaining. It makes me nervous. I figured out how to view recent posts by friends. You go to "view friends' page" except it looks like my page. Carrie set it up for me. It's novelly. Does everyone know the correct definition of peruse? Carrie and I have been using it wrong for years. Make sure you learn it. That's very important. Unimportant, I mean. I forgot how much I like to write. I used to write poetry at work to keep myself awake during naptime. And I'd write poems in my head on the bus or on scrap paper on the train. And now look at me; Carrie suggested my hoodie-do read "nary a thought, nary a word." Now what kind of hoodie-do would that be? Certainly not the hoodie-do I'd like to become. Nary a day goes by without a thought in my head. And nary an hour does pass that a word doesn't pass these lips. Okay, I don't talk in my sleep, so the last sentence was a mis-statement. Do these posts have to be about something? God, I hope not. Mine's about a hooga-hoop. There once was a swanky hooga-hoop who lived with his cousin. They drank tea, played marbles, and sang to the tune of zim zwibble zim. Every morning the hooga-hoop would say to his cousin, "Fall down!" and of course his cousin complied. After all, where would a hooga-hoop's cousin be without the hooga-hoop? No where; that's where. I like myspace because you can send messages directly that aren't read by everybody and his harlock. No offense to the harlock. I just mean that I can't email Carrie on this, can I?
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That's all.
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...if my using my maiden name on this journal is blowing all of your covers... but then, I don't have any friends on here besides you, so I suppose it's alright. I never saw Peter Pan 2. Dammit. It's amazing how big my stomach can get with just a few days of lots of eatin'. Paul, you should eat more. It's tasty. Tastey? Tastey. Tasty? Tastey. Thanks for the laughing, Carrie. I love you.
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This is just a test to see if I remember my password, which I don't.
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The Everything TestThere are many different types of tests on the internet today. Personality tests, purity tests, stereotype tests, political tests. But now, there is one test to rule them all.Traditionally, online tests would ask certain questions about your musical tastes or clothing for a stereotype, your experiences for a purity test, or deep questions for a personality test.We're turning that upside down - all the questions affect all the results, and we've got some innovative results too! Enjoy :-)
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'Tis. I'm going to drink hot chocolate or eat vanilla ice-cream with chocolate syrup. Here is a poem I read today. It's in a book for four-year-olds. Sometimes I moo when I'm chewing I wrote a children's book about a cow, but you shant see it because it isn't patented.
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aggravated
anxious
pleased
contemplative
excited
amused
dirty
annoyed
complacent
frustrated
sleepy